Conversations with a friend.

At least I thought he was. He says I am overracting. I am sure I need a lot of imput on this as I have to be honest and say that I can’t really see his side of the issue. The id has been changed. If you have the time, please read and comment. If I am being a total ass, please tell me why. If I am not.. please tell me why you think so. It would really help. Thanks. Mocha

justsayin: which business babe?

Mocha: I will tell you when the site is up.

justsayin: oh ok

justsayin: ur gonna make a website?

justsayin: thats cool

justsayin: well tell me the adress when its up and ill be sure to check it out

justsayin: its not the porno one is it?

Mocha: yeah

justsayin: ohh man

justsayin: not even to be hella nasty or whatever

justsayin: but id hella be goin there

justsayin: just cuz most porn chicks look way to un-real

justsayin: your the real deal, complete meal, if you ask me

Mocha: ok

justsayin: is it gonna be a pay website

justsayin: or just some free amateur stuff?

Mocha: pay site.

justsayin: awww

justsayin: can you hook it up with a pass or somethin

Mocha: there will be a few free things and I am going to have a free teaser site.. but yeah.. I got to pay my bills.

justsayin: cuz until i get a job, i wont be able to contribute

Mocha: I feel you that is what the teaser site is for.

justsayin: awww

justsayin: u gone do ur boy like that?

justsayin: i guess business is business

Mocha: yeah.. sucks but true and shit.

justsayin: damn, well how much is it gonna cost

Mocha: I don’t know yet.

Mocha: depends on the content and stuff I have to pay and the profit I will need to have to get it together.

justsayin: hmm ok

justsayin: well honestly, if it was ne one else, id gladly pay, but dont take this in the wrong way, i dont feel right paying someone i know for sexuall shit, i mean it just feels like a weird dynamic

justsayin: i mean not to call you a whore, but it reminds me of prostitution in some way

justsayin: and your way above that

Mocha: I am not sure how I am going to take that. and I don’t think I want to talk about this with you ever again. I think I am going to need a lot of space for this.

justsayin: no

Mocha: No really I am totally serious.

justsayin: i didnt mean it to be like that

justsayin: just wait a sec

justsayin: cuz i think u misunderstood me

justsayin: i wasnt tryin 2 say ne thing about ud oin in in general

Mocha: I don’t think I want to EVER talk about this subject again. Don’t ever ask about my work.

justsayin: just wait a sec

justsayin: u gotta let me explain myself

Mocha: Don’t ask me about anything in my life.. again. I don’t think I would feel good telling you about it.

Mocha: No need.

Mocha: You said it.

justsayin: just wait u misunderstood me

justsayin: listen

Mocha:

Mocha: well..

justsayin: im not saying theres anything wrong or shameful or nasty or ne thing with what you do, in fact i think its cool that ur comfortable enought to do it, and im not saying you doing this in general is degrading, because its not, im just saying that i would gladly pay for a sex site, but with someone whom i like, it would feel weird paying for something like that,

justsayin: because reall affection cant be bought

justsayin: thats all im saying

Mocha: Then don’t ask me about my work, don’t ask me about my site and don’t bother with any of it. I would rather just not share that part of myself with you… you know so you don’t feel like I am trying to get you to buy some affection.

Mocha: and if you are wondering.. that didn’t help

justsayin: ok, well honestly i think you are over-reacting, i mean i wasnt trying to talk shit or ne thing, i was actually trying to say something of which might be of some value, considering you cant put a price on attraction and i mean if u misunderstood me and get mad ok, but im trying to explain myself, and miscomunication happens, so i dont see why u cant make any effort to at least meat me half way, i mean u dont have to be completely bitter about it, i just wanted to let you know how i felt about the subject because it would obviously come up again

justsayin: and im sorry if i offended you, but u must realize, i didnt mean to, and therefore considering im not out 2 get you, i dunno why you have to make it seem like that

Mocha: It won’t come up again because we will NEVER talk about this again. You won’t ask me about my work and I won’t tell you about what I am doing.

justsayin: you dont even understand

Mocha: And I am not trying

justsayin: ive been attracted to fuckin porn stars and strippers and shit

justsayin: and i just tell em i cant pay cuz i wouldnt feel right

justsayin: not that what there doing is wrong

justsayin: but its just not somethin i could do

Mocha: that’s fine.. but I don’t want to talk about this with you … I really really mean that.

justsayin: ok

justsayin: well r u in the mood 2 talk about ne thing else?

Mocha: I think it would be better if I didn’t talk to you for a little while. As I digest what you are telling me. I think it would be best that if we remain friends that it is strictly plantonic and never sexual. And right now.. I think I am more in a mood to write than I am to chat. I will talk to you much later.

justsayin: man, this is really rediculuous, i really like you a lot, but you make it hard for me because its seems like you dont always think about the situation for other people

justsayin: like the way you offended me yesterday talking about my pic

justsayin: i dunno where that came from but i dunno what made you think that wouldnt hurt my feelings

justsayin: and i didnt even make a big deal about it

Mocha: What? That you should consider a new one.. because I have seen you and the focus isn’t flattering in the one on the profile. I can’t even SEE you in the goddamn pic.

justsayin: ok, thats all you had to say, instead you said you hated my hat and somethin else i forgot

justsayin: and its not like i mailed you that pic and asked you wat you thought

justsayin: u just decided to start commenting on it out of no where

Mocha: yeah.. I can see how that could be a little insulting.. but that is just my opinion and you are entitled to any feelings that you feel are valid in regard to my critizism of it. Just like I am in our previous conversation. And yeah it was unasked for advice.. sorry if it hurt.. but I stand by what I say and I can expect you to do no less but I can promise to never bring it up again.

Mocha: I will talk to you later.

justsayin: but i dont understand why u gotta be like that

justsayin: i mean im making an effort right now

Mocha: I really really don’t want to do this.

justsayin: ok, well ill leave you alone because theres no point trying to talk if your not in the mood to listen, but to me it feels kinda self-centered to refuse to try and at least bring some type of understanding to something that im trying so hard to do, when i really didnt even mean to hurt u in the first place, i mean its not like i married you and then cheated on you with your best friend, i just expressed something that i felt was essential to adress, and we had a misunderstanding, now im completely in the dog-house, i mean it just seems self-centered, like your not separating yourself from your feelings, refusing to open ur mind and see the issue except in the way you misunderstood what i was saying, and got offended

justsayin: and im sorry if i offended you

justsayin: im not defending what i said im just trying to let you know where im truly coming from

So again.. if you have any comment, please… let me know.

Mocha.

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